This is really going to happen

25 days. In 25 days I will be Mrs. Neil Mutschler. :) OMG! 25 days ago it was the last day of September! That is going to be here so soon! I've been anxiously awaiting the wedding day because well honestly, I just want it to be over lol. I mean, I know it's going to be a wonderful day, but all this planning and organizing and directing and deciding has been so much work and I'm ready to be finished with it. I just want to enjoy being the wife to a wonderful husband. But I have to admit... When I looked at the calendar just now and considered how short 25 days actually is, I panicked a little. Not a bad panic. Maybe panic isn't the right word. I guess I've been so busy keeping track of the days and getting excited about it arriving that it just caught me by surprise that when the day actually gets here, it's going to be HUGE. It means so much. It's going to be life-changing. I mean, not so life-altering like I don't think I can get used to it... but life-changing in the sense that for the first time ever, I will have security and peace. Being with Neil has changed my life for the better...and the day we say our vows, we are making the real commitment to be with each other through everything-good or bad. I've never had anyone make a promise to me like that before... and I've never been expected to promise this to anyone before. I'm so lucky to have someone in my life who I trust with everything... who I know will always love me and try his hardest to not let me down. Of course, everyone makes mistakes. But when I think about all the things I've gone through in my life... family members who I don't know; my parents' ridiculous relationship with each other; my dad's drug addiction; my mom's selfishness; our family's low economic status as a kid.... things have never been stable. I'm used to rocky roads. I feel like whatever life throws our way, Neil and I will conquer it. We're both strong people. We both love each other so much. And wow.... in 25 days, we're going to make promises to each other and to God that we'll keep forever. We'll never leave each other. I know that I can trust him with all my heart. It's an amazing feeling. I don't know why God chose to bless me this way. I know I didn't do anything to deserve him... but I'm going to treasure him forever.