No one knows the number of days

Life is short. How do we know how long we will even be here? I know that many people realize this phenomenon at a funeral or something, but I've considered it more recently. There was a young man I knew from my church when I was in youth group and he died at age 20 or 21. My Grandfather passed away in November, he was in his seventies. My cousin lost her daughter a year ago at the tender age of 17 months.

So I wonder why, I bicker about the silliest things. I plan for my future, so certain that it is coming. I'm studying for the GRE (kind of), hoping that it will mean I get accepted into graduate school... close to home so Neil can stay where he works. I'm planning a wedding which is taking place in 4 months from today. And we argue about where I might go to graduate school, what drinks will be served at our reception and when we'd like to begin having children! But how certain are we that these things will happen? And am I so selfish to say to God, please don't take me before I've accomplished these things? I want to have an education... a career... a family... and I want to feel like my life did fulfill God's purpose...

...but we never can really know when our last breath will be. People die old, all snug in their beds... and people die young, during their birth and even at age 17 months. How does God determine when a person has lived life long enough? And another point my fiance brought to me is .. why will God allow some people to keep on living even though their lifestyles are so unhealthy.. they should've been gone a long time ago? Does God have a purpose for them that he's waiting for them to fulfill... which is why they're still kicking?

Always tell the person you love how much you are blessed by their presence, because you never know when the time will come that you will lose the chance to say it to them again. I need to learn to not take his presence for granted, because life is short and there may be a day when I don't get to hold his hand.

Neil, I love you so much and you're my best friend. Thank you for loving me and holding me in your arms. You're always there for me when I need you. You are utterly amazing to me and I thank God for you.